← Funny
Open on Instagram ↗

Comments (15)

  • @christopherlazu 2026-06-13

    The reason gene pools need a lifeguard 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

  • @blue_buddhist 2026-06-13

    Here's one I read somewhere (probably in a Terry Pratchet book, I think): "You're about as useful as a cyclops with an eye-patch..." 🤣

  • @philliptaylorlowry 2026-06-13

    As an inspector in the oil field I am using some of these if not all of them now, thank you 🤣🤣

  • @glitchghost2003 2026-06-13

    Ngl I'm saving the "trying to see it from your point of view but my head won't fit up my ass", that was brilliant

  • @zay_khaos_williams 2026-06-13

    "Everybody that loves you is wrong" had me doubled over.

  • @k_poptart_666 2026-06-13

    "your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom factory" 😂

  • @chillichocaholic 2026-06-14

    If you were a spice you'd be flour 😂😂😂

  • @anuilaprengaw 2026-06-13

    I have one !! You are as useful as an ashtray on a motorcycle. ( I’m genx and my dad used to say this).

  • @tzkustomz 2026-06-14

    Heyyyyyyy…. Don’t be dissing my Crayola Crayons. As a U.s. Marine.. Taste tests are the only way to get them in the right order

  • @marbylant 2026-06-13

    Ma’am, it’s Saturday morning. 👀 Who pissed you off so profoundly that this was your opening statement? 🫣

  • @christowhi 2026-06-14

    That Easter egg one felt personal...😂

  • @hangingonbyastring 2026-06-14

    No mercy. And in a child’s voice! Just brutal😂

  • @lissy_kins347 2026-06-14

    I kinda want this as a ring tone and see who randomly thinks I'm starting sh!t

  • @jwizemt 2026-06-14

    If you were a spicy would be flour that's hysterical

  • @wiccan_tribal_beachbum 2026-06-15

    “One time, I stepped in poo and wiped it in the grass, and it kinda looked like your face”😂😂😂

Content ideas (0)

No ideas generated yet. Run /instagram-sync ideate from Claude Code to create some.